I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Randomize
