I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
