I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize