my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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