My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
