I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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