$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
