when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
