i think my mom watched the whole time
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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