my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
