literally had 100 drinks last night.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Also, beer. Big fan.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize