i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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