And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
