Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
barbara walters just said penis...
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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