was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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