I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
