he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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