no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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