maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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