just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
the night ended with taco bell and tears
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize