the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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