So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
