hell yes lets make some ravioli
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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