**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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