i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Are we still banned from the library?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He better not be in your backpack
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
