some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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