the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
