I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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