I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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