She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
