His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
