hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
