i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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