nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
