I want to make a zoo with you.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize