think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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