Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
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The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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