i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I think your dad took our porno
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.