I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
