That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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