i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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