East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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