No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
i think im in europe. pls send help
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
