Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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