I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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