Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize