I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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