is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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