why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
