There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
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