Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
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Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
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I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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